January the 1st, 2012

Even though I know what I know, I still can’t help but feel a little optimistic about this year. After all I have the new book coming out, my love life is looking up and around me I have incredibly supportive family and friends. By all rational measures this year is going to be good, one in which I can do myself proud. And yet the dreams I have, the dreams which come to me virtually every night now, give me a completely different notion – one that is suffused with nothing less than doom. Please understand, I’m not a man who normally believes in dreams and yet here they are – so vivid I just want to scream – each and every time I close my eyes. How can I not give them some credence? How can I really believe that at some point the fire I see every night is not actually going to fall from the sky and scorch all it touches?

Let me be clear, I don’t believe in any of that Mayan shit. The notion that 2012 is preordained as the apocalypse just because their calendar ends at what was for them some magnificently far-away science fiction date, is ridiculous. (What was it that man from NASA said? “My calendar runs out on December the 31^st, but I don’t choose to see that as a sign of impending apocalypse, more a sign that I need to buy a new calendar”.) But there is something coming, either this year or swiftly in the next, let me assure you of that. Maybe it will be an onslaught on nuclear weapons, or maybe it’s something I can’t even imagine yet – but I see it every single night and feel now that few things have ever been so real.