I tried to tell Julie about my dreams last night. We had a quiet night in and it was so sweet and pleasant an evening, and there just seemed to be such a deep and strong connection between us, that it appeared the right thing to do. I wanted her to share my thoughts, to understand what was going on in my head.
However, before I got very far at all, she kissed me on the nose and told me that the dreams would pass. I didn’t mention anything more about them, nor did I let on how deflated I felt.
I haven’t told her about seeing Alison (or the text message); I didn’t mention my suspicion that someone else had been in my flat; and now I’m keeping my dreams back from Julie as well. It’s strange as I like her a lot, we have a really good relationship together, but there is just so much going on inside my head that she doesn’t know about. There is just so much of me that she is clueless of.
My therapist doesn’t want to know, so is this the blog my only outlet for these worries? Is there anyone out there who understands what I’m going through?
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